Photo courtesy of Jennifer Gail Photography.We had our first conferences last night. They went as expected. But still.......I just can't shake this feeling I have. A feeling I can't even really name. Disappointment, maybe? I'm not really worried about Ayla and her struggles. When I work with her she can do everything she needs to do. It just takes a bit more time and some extra patience on my part. Her teacher doesn't have the extra time. Her teacher last year didn't have the extra time either. At least I don't think she did. She never noticed Ayla's struggles until I pointed them out to her. Why? Because Ayla knows how to behave herself. She is quiet, obedient & she works hard. Therefore she falls through the cracks. Even now that we know she has problems with vision she falls through the cracks. After all there are several overly energetic kids in her class this year. It's true. I went on a field trip with her class. Mrs. H must be exhausted at the end of every day. She came right out & told us that she doesn't have the extra time that Ayla needs. Could we work with Ayla every night? Can we explain the worksheets she doesn't understand and correct them with her? Yes, of course we can, but.........
I'm glad I have time to focus on my daughter. But I still feel like there is something wrong with this picture. Ayla spends 45 minutes with the reading teacher every single day. Along with 7 other kids from her class. So that teacher has 45 minutes a day with 8 struggling children. Does Ayla fall through the cracks there too. You bet she does. Mrs. S admitted as much to me.
So now what? Ayla loves school. She doesn't share any of the reservations that I have about her teachers. Of course I don't share them with her. Do I just accept things for the way they are? Keep helping her as much as I can here at home? Start helping her teachers by volunteering every week? Like I said I don't mind doing any of this. In fact I am so thankful that I can. That we've decided it's important for me to stay home. That we've chosen to do without some things so that I can. On the other hand I do feel like there is something that is just off when it comes to our school systems & society in general. There isn't an easy solution. So, I will continue to focus on my home and my family. I think it all starts there.
20 comments:
I'm sorry that the teachers are like that. But maybe a little parent participation is best. I know I'm not there yet, but like you said, it all starts here (home), so maybe it's for the best... ? I'm glad you don't mind, it'll make it easier for you!
Sorry your in this spot but thankful and glad that Ayla has a mother (family) that is willing to help her.
I'm reminded over and over how thankful we are to be homeschooling.
Hope it works out for ya'll.
*p.s. that pic is adorable!
So sorry for you and Ayla! Maybe schedule a mtg w/the principal and the teacher to discuss your concerns, so she gets all the help she needs - i would probably volunteer in the classroom some as well.
Not sure I have any profound advice to offer....but it's good that you're aware and concerned. A LOT of kids don't have parents like that. This is one of those things that makes my blood boil if I start to think about it....that we live in a society where athletes and movie stars get paid bajillions but teachers are overworked and underpaid and can't spend quality time with students in smaller classes... and we all shake our heads in disbelief when we read about misbehaving kids in the news, etc... GEESH. Stay involved and concerned....!!
Being in the classroom, I can see how the teacher can't give each kid the one-on-one time they deserve. And yes, it is too bad. Especially for the kids who do need that extra time.
Does the school have a teacher's aid or someone who can spend some extra time with her? I just got something from Kylie's school looking for parent volunteers to spend 30 mins/week with a kid listening to them read. Check to see if your school has that.
I agree about volunteering more in the classroom. :)
Wondering out loud here. If the school itself has no other available help for Ayla can you get the school SYSTEM (county/state) to give her outside help? You pay your taxes like everyone else, so... School systems (not the individual school) offers help to students with illness, etc. Maybe Charla can give advise?
i don't think so susan. when we found out she needed eye therapy i called the head of special services for the school district. she only qualifies for help if she has some sort of disorder. nothing has been diagnosed. it's too soon to know if she is dyslexic. if she is then maybe she'd get extra help. all she really needs is more time to complete things. also a bit of individual attention to make sure she understands what she's supposed to be doing.
I'm so sorry. This is a HUGE problem in our schools, and here in California the schools are being chewed up and spit out as the state tries to get control of its financial situation. The kids are always the ones that lose. Kudos to you for being so on top of things. I have no advice, but your post just cemented in my mind that the craziness going on at our house right now is worth going through to keep my kids at a school with small classes and individual attention.
I have noticed a HUGE difference in schools. Truth is... you don't realize how good a teacher or a school system is until you've experienced worse. Kekoa was in Early Kindergarten at a local town last year. I never had concerns... always felt like he was getting what he needed. We decided to open enroll him to another highly thought of smaller school system at a local town just outside of Ames. Best decision we EVER made. Ames is the same as what you just described... they don't have the time to give to the individual child. Gavyn has an amazing preschool teacher here in Ames, but it takes someone beyond amazing to manage what she has to every day... kids with behavioral problems, kids that can't speak English... so like you said... Gavyn... the well behaved one kind of gets ignored. And they have THREE teachers in that classroom. Kekoa has two teachers in his classroom of 25... they are busy, but I feel like she pays attention. Always bringing things to my attention that she notices about Kekoa. No answer for you, really, other than I like the volunteering in the classroom idea if you could somehow make that work.
I have no idea what to say. It sounds like she's going to special classes at school that are supposed to help her, but that's not working either. Is she dyslexic? Would that qualify for more specialized one-on-one time?
Could you get her some special workbooks that she can do at home but thinks are fun? Or maybe some books she can read to you every night?
I also thought that maybe you could have a meeting with the principal...as Pam already mentioned.
Good luck--sorry if my advice is of no use...
I took a class last week called handwriting readiness, taught by an early childhood occupational therapist. (not sure if that was her exact title) One of the curriculums that is really being pushed is Handwriting Without Tears. hwtears.com . Hard to know if its the right reference, without knowing what she's struggling with??
it's too soon to know if she's dyslexic. we think that all her struggles are vision related. it's probably kind of hard to focus on reading, math, or anything if you can't use both eyes together. anyway, the therapy is helping with that. just hope she doesn't get behind in the meantime.....
cheri - i will look into that handwriting curriculum. she is a lefty & she starts all her letters from the bottom up. i'm supposed to re-train her, but it's not easy. she will trace all the letters the correct way, but once she has a blank paper she writes them her way!
Great blog, Mindy- just found it! Thanks so much for the adorable clothes- your hubby made a special delivery after mtg Sunday. ;-)Now we know what Rhya will be wearing next spring 'n summer!
When my bro was in 1st grade he needed help with reading. The thing that finally helped it 'click' was a computer program called 'Reader Rabbit' that he'd use after school. It was FUN, yet educational. I don't know what all is out there as far as computer games that teach, and maybe you've looked into it already but..just a thought. Ayla is such a cute li'l trooper!
Darla L
it definitely "starts there" and you're doing such a nice job at it! I'm sure the teachers would appreciate your help volunteering! I would do that if possible, otherwise, keep working with her at home...How great that she does so well despite her challenges. She has a great personality!! Hugs to you..we always want things perfect for our kids and it hurts when it's less..
hey there - send me your e-mail address...mine is
kristencoker at hotmail dot com
You'll never regret time spend on your family! Keep it up!
I didn't read all the posts, so maybe you heard some of this, but here it goes:) Ayla is lucky to have help at home, many don't. I volunteer during my lunch hour in Bretta and Caden's classes to work with low readers and many of the teachers in our building have even called high school study hall to see if there is a responsible student to come help in their classroom. Maybe Ayla's teacher will see if she can get a HS tutor for extra time with struggling students. There are some great research based interventions for reading that you can order for your home computer and they really help too. Let me know if you want some names. One I just looked at the other day was Explode the Code...great decoding tool, but you want to get something that is geared towards what she struggles with. Good Luck...TammieNelson
Yes--everything you can do at home. Things like this are so hard. Things like this are part of the reason that we choose to homeschool, and also currently drive out of our way every day to take our youngest to a very small (& very good) school.
I volunteered some at different times, but in my experience it simply wasn't particularly beneficial to my kids. And--ditto to your #4 comment post!
Mindy,
Trust your gut instinct with what you feel is happening in the classroom.
All the therapy interventions on your part will help.
School needs to hear from you every day. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. I would ask for a meeting with the school psychologist or the principal. That individual knows what's in place in your building for struggling students. Ask for an intervention plan. I'll help you write one for her if you need me to do that. Just a shell of a plan that you already have an idea about might make it easier for the school to take it and use it! Every minute of support of the front end of school makes such a huge difference in the research for later success in school.
I teach. I know what teachers are facing. I also know that every parent who's ever approached me in a respectful way with a reasonable request I've been able to help in some small way.
Inbox me on FB if you want to talk about intervention plans.
Hugs.
Charla
such a sweet pic of Ayla at the top!
I have nothing to add- just hope it goes well for you and A!
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